The grand national for me, conjours up a variety of mixed emotions.

Clearly, although not an active member of the RSPCA I think that horse  racing, generally, can be a tad barbaric. I recall years ago the media hysteria over a jockeys excess use of the whip. If memory serves correct it wasnt just the occasional gentle swipe of encouragement, it was the rider battering the fuck out of the poor horseys left side.

Similarly, historic discourse over the jump size of certain hedges has been well documented  due to the number of equestrian related fatalities.

However, If perpetually battered and bruised and exploited and ridden to the brink of exhasution, does common sense not dictate that as soon as the mount approaches a particularly high jump it should really  stop in mid stride - throw the jockey arse over, and then proceed to stomp on its former rider accordingly? In fact, why do all the horseys not concoct some masterplan of retribution prior to the start? I really think horses should re-enter the education system and go back to school.

**Baddum**

Earliest 'human footprints' found

The article continued by suggesting that these 1.5million year old foot prints located in Kenya confirm that the apparent spacing between digits and heel substantiated the gate and upright posture of the early homosapian.

However, its apparently clear to see from the well preserved imprint that the foot was, at that time, still capable of grasping trees and other woodland-type debris. Accordingly, the archeolhistorigeologist that unearthed this find, maintains you can clearly see the eveloutionary transition taking place those many moons ago. Hence - they can say with complete uncertainty that this is truly the oldest human foot print ever found.

This - I find a load of old shit.

Firstly, its clear to see from the picture that humans only had one leg confirming that we probably descended from the humble ostrich rather than the ape.

Equally, and not forgetting, today, there are many born with foot/feet disfigurements. This may range from an unsightly bunyon to having a solitary large obtrusive big toe  through to having strange deformed webbed toes. Either way - these freaks do not represent the majority of the modern human population.
 
Should alian investigators pop across to planet ostrich-ape when human life has finally become extingushed, and locate prints made from these strange lot - will they then conclude we were some form of strange amphibian lifeform?


"Get your coat love - you've pulled."

Its tuly possible.

Returning back to the fossilised prints where we came in - was this individual assuredly a representative sample of the other bipeds roaming around vast quantities of untainted land? Or was it just some old dear with a gammy foot.

History - lets be frank, is purely complete speculation with a few kinks and a bit of poetic license chucked in for good measure.

However. I then had the unfortunate experience of watching  one of these fuck off abroad or rather escape to the country type programs on bbc one.,

FOr those unfamilar with the formatt, you take an unhappy british family (there's lots to chose from) and then pay them to spend a week in australia to decide if they feel the urge to up sticks and emmigrate.

BASically, this 'make a new lif abroad' visual extravaganza see's a couple seek exactly the same type of job oversea's as they already have at home. It then enables them to find a house oversea's, thats exactly the same as  the one they already have at home, Finally, it encourages them to embrace a life-style overseas with the same husband or wife or child that they currently have at home- thats exactly the same as they have at home.

Incredible idea and I can see the attraction.
 

Regardless, the thing here is that from watching this program on two seperate occasions - there  appears to be a growing trend. Not in terms of emmigration, but of both women and men uniting and wearing more and more and larger and larger  necklaces.

No longer is fine craftsmanship and understaed chic the aim of the game the sole aspiration seems to be to wear a necklace thats the size of a fucking australian house.






This raises two relevant points. Firsly, the wearing of such wieghty items could alter the next stage of the human eveloutionary process - returning us back to the stooping homo-not-so-erectus of yesteryear - or alternatively, the sheer weight of said costume jewellry could sink the land further into the rapidly rising sea levels. Effectively, speeding up the sinking of all remaining land mass with the final effect being the erradication of all lie on earth.

Perhas then, footprints mean fuck all.

Take what you want from this - Im currently hungover with a wolley mammoth the size of a planet  cavorting inside my head and mouth.

 

Morning folks - hope we're all equally well.

Im currently working stupid shifts - not in terms of lenghty hrs - but due to work shafting me with fucking stupid calls. I may be allocated a mere 4 hrs - but they are spread unevenly and irritatingly throughout the course of the full day. First call may be starting at 6 - then nothing until lunch.

 Then, after a not in the slightest needed break - I'm out and about at 9pm ish.

I wont miss this one-fucking-Iota.

That said, one of the older gentleman I visit has just started opening up to me about his wife and the problems she/they face. Quite an emotional moment for both of us actually.

I hope they will both be ok. And I will miss finding out how they both get on through life.

Then there are the others, some I like, some I find fucking infuriating - and some that you dont have feelings for either way.

Regarding the ones I find 'challanging' - I  try and ask myself how I would feel if forced to endure their enforced quality of life.

I think I'd probably be damn sight worse than they are.

But thats that.

As iv'e said in the past, its the worst paid job in the world. Those that work in the lower eschelons of the fast food industry or those that clean are paid more than most in the care industry.Yet its the most important job in the world.

You can be treated like shit and sometimes feel like an extra from upstairs downstairs - yet when you have brought an ounce of pleasure to someone or induced a smile or a laugh - those are the things that you take away and store inside.

Right, Im away to Lidl to buy some kitchen roll and sponges.